I live in a fantasy,
My life is one big daydream,
There is no such thing as reality,
I block out all that is around me,
Living in my mind,
Dreaming.
I try to escape,
The cruelty I face,
Day after day,
By pretending.
I spend my time,
Making myself believe,
That which I imagine,
The life that I've made up.
In my made up life story,
I always get the guy,
He loves me and saves me,
When I'm about to lose sanity,
I disguise my real life,
Play it out in my head,
Switch the ending,
To make it shine,
Make it glitter.
My real life is dull,
It is sad and painful,
I feel worthless, small,
And so I bleed.
I bleed worthless blood,
Blood no one cares about,
Blood no one sees.
I cry tears,
That end up drying on my face,
Never wiped away,
In reality.
In my fantasy,
I bleed and they care,
I cry and they wipe the tears,
I fall and I'm caught.
In my fantasy,
I go through the pain,
Only to be saved,
After suffering,
Becoming happy.
I daydream to escape,
And this is my mistake,
For when I wake,
Realize what I'm living is fake,
I fall back harder,
I go down faster,
And I stay down longer,
I break.
I break,
And I am broken for days,
I no longer pretend,
I live outside the comforting haze.
I will slowly heal,
And begin again,
Recede back into,
My fantasy land,
My escape.
COMMENTS FROM ME, THE AUTHOR OF THIS POEM:
This poem may be simple for some to understand, and hard for others. Let me clarify. Sometimes I live my life, pretending that different events occur, and a different outcome is the result. I don't really know why I do this. I jazz up my life in my mind. Everything I want, I get. Everything I lost, I find. But I always suffer first in my mind, before I gain anything. Maybe because it makes the reward that much sweeter. I don't know why I set up this alternate world for myself. I just end up disappointed. But I do it anyway, and sometimes without realizing it. You may think I am crazy know that you've read this. But hey, thanks for reading it. <3Emily
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